Even though I have not been sitting down to my screen writing the last few days it doesn't mean that I have not been getting a swift kick from life in making me see it's lessons to be learned from!
Anyone who has ever lived with someone; can probably relate to the "how" and "why would I do this to myself?" thinking! At first living together is lovely and sometimes a dream come true; only to later realize uh, hold on, I have to change the way I've been happily doing things for "x" amount of years just because of someone else? I want to know who decreed that was a formal rule of proper living!
I must care about my other half dearly, more to the point, he must have the patience of a Saint to care about me just as much; as we have been together through some pretty tough spots together- my headstrong ways usually don't help add to the mix in a delightful way either. Yet, miraculously we still are quite keen of each others company. But there are times I look at him and wonder "Who the hell are you?" Only to realize later in the day, crap, I probably owe him an apology; that is exactly the case circa 3-4 days ago!
To be honest I could not even tell you what the whole palaver was about now but it did turn into me probably doing a bit of self sabotage and what would have been a lovely notion ended up with "us", namely me, not seeing eye to eye about something; thanks to my fiery temperament!
During "our", namely me, cooling off time I started to grab items out of the fridgerator to get dinner on. After the first 5 minutes of frantic pounding and demon chopping the poor, unsuspecting vegetables, I started to slow down and my mind started to wander a bit. I mean, I knew what I was doing, with very large- sharp, knife in hand, but repetitive motion, I found, has a tendency to chill me out and I can relax and start to think deeply. I thought of the stupidity of the "incident" and realized I was probably being a lot more selfish than I should have been, and that at the end of the day; did it all really matter? Well, no, I concluded it didn't really matter and I was getting bent for a very silly reason instead of looking at the positive in the situation; one of my many downfalls.
So as I was prepping the salad for tea that night I realized open communication is the way to go, I owed my other half an attempt at "I'm sorry" and wanted nothing more than to nourish my loved ones with something healthy and absolutely tasty for dinner; it seems to be one way I show my love- I feed those close to me with equisite food!
Bless his heart, when he saw me coming, he was a bit dubious with a " I wonder whats coming now" look. But I walked up to him, gave a hug and apologized for me being a selfish twit. With a smile creeping across his face "we", meaning me, sorted "things" out and ended up having a lovely evening together. So in future never underestimate the power of a good vegetable slicing to get your perspective in the right order about life. Or if you don't have any vegtables to hand, to demolish on your own accord, just order a salad and remember instead. :)
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